"When metaphors attack"

From Ezra Klein:

There are days when Thomas Friedman seems to be writing his columns just to screw with Matt Taibbi's head. To wit:

Over the next couple of years, two very big countries, America and China, will give birth to something very important. They’re each going to give birth to close to $1 trillion worth of economic stimulus — in the form of tax cuts, infrastructure, highways, mass transit and new energy systems. But a lot is riding on these two babies. If China and America each give birth to a pig — a big, energy-devouring, climate-spoiling stimulus hog — our kids are done for. It will be the burden of their lifetimes. If they each give birth to a gazelle — a lean, energy-efficient and innovation-friendly stimulus — it will be the opportunity of their lifetimes.

The human "gattling metaphor gun"

From an interview (really):

"And so I’ve kind of developed an answer that to me India and China are both two six-lane superhighways. And everyone’s going really fast.

Now China’s a six-lane superhighway — perfectly paved roads, perfect sidewalks, streetlamps on a lot of these highways. Just one problem. Off in the distance there’s a speed bump called political reform. And when 1.3 billion people going 80 miles an hour hit a speed bump, one of two things happens: your car jumps up in the air, slams down, everyone says, You O.K.? You O.K.? I’m O.K., drives on; the other thing that happens, car jumps up in the air, slams down and all the wheels fall off. And what will happen in China’s case? I have no idea. All I know is I’m rooting for the first scenario.

Now India’s also a six-lane superhighway — cracked cement, half the sidewalks aren’t finished and three-quarters of the streetlights don’t work. But off in the distance it looks like it smoothes out into a perfect six-lane superhighway. "

KOPPEL. Because?

FRIEDMAN. The question with India: Is that a mirage or is that the oasis? So those are the two big questions I have —

Particular gems in bold. The interview is also with Joe Stiglitz, whom Friedman (rightly) interrupts a number of times to deliver a flat smackdown. More to follow from this treasure trove of Friedmanisms.

Testimonial to the Mustachioed maestro

I am always grateful to see that Tom's talent does not go unappreciated in this digital age of ours. I am also comforted to see that it is now widely recognized that Tom's mustache is the fount and wellspring of his counter-intuitive and earth-shattering visions of contemporary life in a connected age of roaring trade within the electronic jungle.

"Amazing. Tom Friedman is a God. No, not a God so much as a moustachioed force of nature, pumped up on the steroids of globalization, a canary in the coalmine of an interconnected era whose tentacles are spreading over the face of a New Economy savannah where old lions are left standing at their waterholes, unaware that the young Turks—and Indians—have both hands on the wheel of fortune favors the brave face the music to their ears to the, uh, ground."

Kieran Healey, Crooked Timber

Friedman shows familiarity with Alasdair Macintyre

"The first rule of holes is when you’re in one, stop digging. When you’re in three, bring a lot of shovels"

(Imbalances of Power, May 2008)

Questions for Friedmanites: is the shovel preferable to a (i) hatchet, and (ii) scalpel? And are the number of shovels a linear function of the number of holes one finds oneself in?